So this blogging thing is really proving to be harder to get into than I thought it would be. A million things go through my mind a day, and every time I think, "Today should be the day to start blogging," then when I actually get around to the computer I completely forget what I was going to write. I'm hopeless.
I used to use that website called Xanga ALL the time throughout high school. A couple months ago I went back to that ancient "blog" and read through a lot of my entries. It was a really cool experience. Good Lord how I have changed! I've been through hell and back since that last entry, and feel so much smarter and mature. Those were the good days, though, and I would love to go back and visit that time again.
The difference between then and now? Then, I was some love struck teen that thought that boy was THE ONE. Now, he is THE ONE who broke my heart and turned into a jerk. Then, I was goody goody two-shoes that never thought twice about doing anything "bad." Now, I've lived the party life, made mistakes I never would have seen myself making, and realized that entire life is completely overrated. Then, everyone loved me and I was the best friend someone could ask for, and 100% loyal. Now, I think back and see that I was gullible. I'm not proud to say that I've made enemies, and some people see me as hypocritical, which they have every right to think. I still care about what people think of me, but now I'll stick up for myself and be okay if others don't agree. Then, I was best friends with Anna & Katie, but they admittedly were replaced by Cody (aka "THE ONE [or not]"). Now, I see the ultimate mistake in leaving friends for a boy. The girls and I are still friends, but very distant. There is now my best friend Danielle, and my HUSBAND Drew!
But perhaps the biggest difference... Then, I was stuck in this bubble and didn't know who I was. Now, I've broken out of that shell, lived my life, made my mistakes, and found MYSELF in the midst of chaos. I found this crazy side of me that meets a guy, falls madly in love, then runs off to Vegas 2 months later to get married. Yep, little Miss Goody Two-Shoes DID THAT. And I've never looked back. No regrets, just happily ever after. Too good to be true? Not at all.
I love being an Army Wife. I'm independent and secure, and can handle the time alone. As long as I have my Jesus and my dog, I can handle anything life has to throw at me. Well, and my wonderful hubby, of course! <3
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